The Style Invitational: January 26

Posted on January 26, 2003 by Gene

The latest contest in The Washington Post’s Style Invitational asked for acts, bills, or resolutions sponsored by new members of Congress. Some of my faves:

• Miller-Miller-Dole act to provide every hungry person in America with two beers and a pineapple. (Ellen Perlman, Washington)
• The Cole-Porter-Musgrave-Turner Act awarding Eminem a Medal of Freedom for his contribution to the field of music. (Chris Doyle, Forsyth, Mo.)
• Alexander-Grijalva-Bell Act requiring greater clarity in cellular phones. (Kevin Mellema, Falls Church)
• Bell-Pryor-Bishop Act, mandating that clergy wear cat-bells so you can hear them coming. (Seth Brown, Williamstown, Mass.)
• The King-Chocola resolution in support of the erstwhile count’s military coup. (Sarah Elan, Baltimore)
• Ryan-King Act: Hakuna matata! Even Tlent Rott wouldn’t touch this bill! (Dave Zarrow, Herndon)
• Musgrave-Pryor-Nunes act requiring all interments before midday at Arlington National Cemetery. (Stephen Dudzik, Olney)
• Alexander-Graham-Sanchez bill saluting the founder of Taco Bell. (Dave Zarrow, Herndon)
• Franks-Hensarling-King bill authorizing Perdue chickens to surf the Web. (Dave Zarrow, Herndon)