The late, late film review

Posted on August 27, 2006 by Gene

I’m quite proud of the fact that I’ve never seen — nor had any desire to see — the last three Star Wars movies. I mean, I could tell from the previews that they certainly had nothing in common with the original or even its sequels. But tonight, “Episode II” is on television, and I tuned in for a little bit.
It is far worse than I even expected.
The CGI is, well, obviously CGI, lending an un-realism to everything that makes it hard to suspend your disbelief. Even the poor reviews call it “visually stunning,” but I was stunned so much that I was pulled right out of the story — whatever that was.
There was, to be sure, an exciting chase scene with Obi Wan Kenobi hitching a ride on some kind of assassin droid.. but it went on and on and on… and on and on and on. 
But the kicker is the horrible, horrible acting and the terrible, terrible dialogue. I can’t watch more than five minutes at a time (instead switching over to the gloriously better “Pirates of the Caribbean”) because it is like watching a high school play. Or a cheap dinner theatre. It’s that bad. And this film has Samuel L. Jackson and Ewan MacGregor, so you tell me — where does the fault lie?
Jeez, it’s amazing that George Lucas made such a brilliant, fun, exciting film as Star Wars on a comparatively small budget; then when confronted with limitless resources he just ruined it all.