Just As I Thought

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You know, the last time this whole “indecency on television” boondoggle reared it’s ugly head, the government came up with the ridiculous “V-Chip.” Remember that? What about TV content ratings? Don’t these boneheaded moral crusaders from the PTC notice the rating at the top of the screen that’s supposed to warn of vulgar language and violence?
One problem — for there are many — is that any parent who might conceivably have a speck of brain matter and decide to limit what their kids can watch is probably likely to be bamboozled by the arcane and complicated procedure to activate the V-Chip… and in fact, their kids are far more adept at circumventing it.
Of course, the fundies don’t actually want you to be able to limit your kid’s viewing, they simply want to a) call attention to themselves and b) keep all the good porn for themselves.

For those of you who had no idea that we already had a ratings system in place, I give you this handy guide, courtesy of TV Barn. Cut it out and glue it to the side of your television, won’t you?

There are two ratings codes used at the beginning of every entertainment program airing on television today. The first is age-based and is modeled on the movie industry’s ratings system. The second, which children’s advocates lobbied for after the passage of the 1996 Telecommunications Act, adds letters that describe the type of mature content in the program. All networks use the age-based ratings but NBC has refused to include the description letters.

TV-Y: The show is suitable for all children. (Note: The American Academy of Pediatrics has urged parents ban TV use for their children under age 2.)

TV-Y7: Appropriate for children 7 and older who can distinguish between fantasy and reality.

TV-Y7 FV: Program contains fantasy violence but is suitable for children 7-up.

TV-G: Suitable for all ages. Unlike the above ratings, these programs are intended for adult viewership as well, but TV-G indicates that kids can watch the shows unattended.

TV-PG: Parental guidance suggested.

TV-14: Parents strongly cautioned. By now most parents have enough experience with the movie industry’s PG and PG-13 ratings to understand these two.

TV-MA: Mature audiences only. Programs like “South Park” and “The Shield” are rated TV-MA and their networks have pledged not to promote these shows at earlier hours, when more kids may be watching.

DLSV: Letter codes which may appear on-screen with the show’s age-based rating. They indicate the presence of graphic sexual description (D), strong language (L), on-screen sex (S) and violence (V).

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