When it’s time to change

Posted on June 16, 2004 by Gene

You know, for a long time I’ve been thinking — in a shallow way, way back in my brain — about moving.
Not moving down the street, or to another county, but far away. Austin, Santa Fe, Monterey, someplace like that.
I’ve been thinking more seriously about it lately. I don’t know, I’m not really dissatisfied with my life but I just feel kind of… blah. I’ve lived here in Washington, D.C. all my life — 37 years, except for one 9-month stint in San Jose, California. My house is only blocks from where my parents lived when I was born, and the elementary school I went to is up the hill.
I am beginning to realize that the atmosphere here may have a lot to do with the way I perceive my life and other people. And now that I’ve travelled a bit — every year for work, and to Austin and London recently — I realize that people in other cities are actually friendly.
Washington is not laid back. It’s not very friendly. No, it’s all about appearances and power here. I recognize this, especially in the gay community (and I use the word “community” loosely). But I’ve started to finally recognize it in myself. I’m not very friendly, and I lack the ability to take people at face value, always wondering “what’s in it for them” when I meet them.
This is no way to live. So, I’ve decided to make a change.
I haven’t made any final decisions yet, but I’m leaning toward a move to Austin. Even though it’s Dubya’s neck of the woods, it’s also home to such people as Molly Ivins and Ann Richards, and tons of other Bush-whacking intelligent and wonderful people. And I even have friends there, who insist that Austin would love me.
Have you ever uprooted your life and made a huge change? How did you do it? How did you get the courage? Tell me how.