Just As I Thought

Style Invitational: Go for the Gold

Entries from today’s Style Invitational, which asked for ways to cut corners at the upcoming yet unready Greek Olympics:

No need to introduce every last little country in the Opening Ceremonies: Just group them as “Coalition” and “Evildoers.” (Milo Sauer)

Make “Return to Ruin” the official Olympic theme, and shun contemporary “finished” construction in favor of a retro, roofless, wall-less, sanitationless decor. (Josh Tucker, Kensington)

Do it like the NBC coverage, and hold just the events that the Americans have a shot in. (Brendan Beary, Great Mills)

Reduce the number of paid Olympics officials so it’s only twice the number of athletes. (Chris Doyle)

Daily stadium giveaways: Friday, hard hats; Saturday, chamber pots; Sunday, first 2,000 fans get self-adhesive linoleum squares (available in Locker Room 5). (Jean Sorensen, Herndon)

Hang a “Mission Accomplished” sign three months ago. (Jonathan Obee, Washington)

URGENT. CONFIDENTIAL. I can provide access to a dormant account in the

Nigerian National Bank that holds sixty million US dollars which will help you fund your construction . . . (Dr. William Ngama, Lagos) (Chris Doyle, Forsyth, Mo.)

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