RT @BorowitzReport: #Oscars It would be so much for informative if they skipped who they’re wearing and told us who operated on them.

Gray Davis cut taxes, deficit: $23B. Recalled & replaced by Schwarzenegger. Schwarzenegger raised taxes, deficit: $21B. When’s the recall?

I think that something like 40% of my email server storage allocation is taken up with reply emails that just say “Thanks.”

MercNews headline: “Los Gatos man wins Pontiac on lottery TV show.” And not a hint of irony in the story.