I can only assume that the cosmos knows best: every time my urge to call B — just to hear his voice — gets too much to bear, I pick up the phone… only to discover that whichever phone I happen to be near is the one that doesn’t have his number programmed into it. I only have his number in one phone, and as my phones are identical cordless handsets, it’s almost like roulette. You never know which one is where and when.
So far, it’s always been the one without his number.
Is the fickle hand of fate trying to tell me something?
I’m sorry, yes it is.
My thoughts are the very best thing you can do is find the handset with B’s number on it and delete it.
If he should choose to call you and want to chat then fine, but it would be better for him and better for you if you do not call him.