Last evening, I went to the Santa Cruz Boardwalk with Jann, Mike, Carla, and little Tommy. Amid the carnival atmosphere, the hot dogs on a stick, and the screams of people on rollercoasters, I learned some very important lessons.
- While you are struggling to win 4 or 5 tickets at Skeeball, the little kid you brought with you will win 20 tickets on the video game.
- If you’re looking for hot guys to gaze at, the Boardwalk is the place.
- If you don’t want gay guys to stare at you, stop rubbing your muscular chest to make the nipples pop out to show your buddies you’re cold. Over and over and over and over.
- Garlic fries sound delicious, and for the first few they are. But after you’ve eaten about 2% of the basket, you begin to wonder why they put so many in it.
- It’s just as fun to ride the kiddie rides as it is to ride the big scary adult rides. As long as there’s a kid with you.
And the ego boost of the day? Getting carded at the concession stand. When you approach 40, it’s the little things you enjoy, right?
