I was supposed to go to San Francisco’s big pride festival this weekend, but I just… well, for so many reasons, I just decided not to. First off, I am suddenly swamped with work that needs to be finished at the beginning of next week, so weekend work is staring me in the face. Second, I’d be going with my friends Jann and Mike, and frankly it sometimes takes a lot of my energy to spend long stretches — two days — with Jann, he exhausts me, both from fighting with him and just keeping up when we’re not fighting. But mostly, I’m tired of being a third wheel. The single guy going somewhere with the couple, surrounded by couples, and feeling very uncomfortable in a city where people are far more uninhibited that I on a normal day. And Gay Pride weekend will not include a “normal” day.
Some day, maybe when I have someone to help ground me, I’d like to be less inhibited, more fun and carefree. But I’m beginning to think that as I move toward my 40s, I should just accept the fact that I am who I am: a somewhat morose, Eeyore-esque guy who doesn’t really know how to have fun.
Please note this quote from Eeyore, and how things are actually worse than he thinks. (Hint: check out the post from last Thursday.)
“It’s snowing still,” said Eeyore gloomily. “So it is.” “And freezing.” “Is it?” “Yes,” said Eeyore. “However,” he said, brightening up a little, “we haven’t had an earthquake lately.”
