Here comes Brood X – the 17 year cicadas. They’re about to emerge from their underground incubation and smother in green, bulbous insectoid creepiness.
I remember with dread their emergence 17 years ago, when they were everywhere – covering the sidewalks and roads, all over the car… so many that it was impossible to dodge them, killing them by the hundreds just on the way to the grocery store, smashing them on windshields and under wheels. Gross.
And I just bought a new car.
Fate is cruel.
Tom Ridge should be on the verge of issuing some kind of color-coded alert. (How about “slimy green?) He should call for sealing oneself in the house with duct tape. My suggestion for those of you are under, say, 20 and don’t remember the 1987 event: get yourself inside and don’t come back out until it’s over.
SOYLENT CICADAS!!!!!!!!!