Just As I Thought


  • My partner of 22 years could care less about my blog. He doesn’t read it nor does he care if I blog about him. He need not worry, as I wouldn’t get too personal in a public forum. If anything he wants me to get MORE personal. He feels there is a writer trapped inside me and is working to bring it out. (I see no such talent)

    He has on occasion directed others to my blog as I have recipes that they want and he’ll call and say so and so wants your chili recipe and I’ll remind him it’s on the blog for all to see and if they want it then they know where to go.

    The issue you need to resolve is boundaries. You are a blogger that is what you do and any partner you have, needs to understand your NEED to blog about it. They on the other hand have a right to privacy and most definettly don’t want the world to know they couldn’t get it up last night because they drank too much wine. The boundaries are something you and he work out together and it’s part of the relationship process.

    My suspicion is those boundaries are different with every couple and even change as your relationship changes. Be flexible, allow him some topics that are off limits and after you have worked this out you’ll both be more comfortable. He’ll know you’ll blog about the great evening you shared while understanding that you wouldn’t blog about any part that might make him uncomfortable.

    The key here is the two of you work on this together.
    The two of you decide where the boundaries are.

    If you can do that now you’ll save yourself a lot of heart break and hurt feelings in the future.

  • It’s still your life. Altering your life to make someone else happy is a questionable strategy. If who you are makes him unhappy, is he the right person for you? Of course it’s not that black and white. Not losing yourself in a realtionship is of paramount importance. Don’t learn the hard way.

  • I see Wes’ point about not altering your life, but this is just a PART of your life. Besides, it’s a part that greatly involves him. I don’t think he’s suggesting that you do away with the blog altogether, just his part.
    I rarely share much info about my wife on my blog, mainly because that’s a part of my life that is just MINE. You know that scene in ‘Saving Private Ryan’ when Matt Damon asks Tom Hanks to tell him the story about his wife and the roses and Hanks says, “No, that one I save just for me” well, it’s kinda like that.
    There are some things in this world that just belong to you, and some things that just belong to the two of you. That’s one exclusive club that I wish we all had.

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